Monday, February 22, 2010

Doctor's Appointment!

Had my doc appointment today just over three weeks from when I had an EGD scope done.  The news was good for a change! Praise the Lord!!  THANK YOU JESUS!!!!


The only 2 things about all this that bothers me is this is 1) he told me in the recovery room that I had an infection of H.pyori (sp) that could either be a peptic ulcer or cancer.  He also told me that my Barrett's was inflamed (I got pictures of one of my Barrett's spots AND a picture from inside, down, and around to look at the Nissen that they did in the hopes of healing up the Barrett's.  THAT picture scared the holy hell out of me because he was telling me what normal looks like and then showed me when I had the Barrett's flare up so bad a pencil wouldn't fit in my esophagus and in the picture (1 sheet)  there was something that looked "normal" and something that looked all wrinkled and scarred and I thought it was cancer because he didn't tell me WHAT it was - showed me my inflamed tissue then grabbed another sheet of my Barrett's to show me what THOSE looked like and I am just knowing it's cancer that I'm looking at because it is no where near nice and neat and all that compared to the others.  And THEN he tells me that is the Nissen that they did in 2005.  Good thing the room I was in didn't have any windows.  My exhale of relief would have probably blown them out!  2) In the office he's talking about my Barrett's and how he thinks we should be able to go every 2 years and not every year and all that and then asks if I have any questions.  I'm like yeah what about the infection, the H. pyori or whatever it's called.  He said "What infection?"  I was SOOOOOOOOOO glad my DIL went with me because she said "Oh yeah you did, you told us she had an infection at the entrance to her stomach and that it was that H name and that you said you took a biopsy to see which problem it actually was.  And now you don't know anything about this infection?"  I have to admit, I was ticked off - I had worried for 3 friggin weeks knowing my time was up for getting the cancer and he didn't know what I was talking about.  He had to get the nurse helper to go get the "glow"(sp) report and THEN told me I was negative for everything except a new Barrett's spot.  I coulda decked him for that.  I know he has a lot of patients and he can't remember them all but....sheesh.

It's something I have to live with hanging over me like the sword of Damocles.  It's not a matter of "if" but "when".  So yes, I worry - sometimes a lot, sometimes it's just a twitch in my mind.  But never goes away completely.  Something new will happen and I'll sometimes think "is this it"?  Most of the time, no.  But on occasion it kicks me in the butt.  More talk on this later - I'm tired and wanna go watch a guy go on a killing rampage.  Dunno which one but I'll figure it out b4 too long.

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